When NOT to give feedback?

What a question, right? In the context of organizations, feedback should be commonplace, well given and well received. Is it? Lately I have been working with some great companies that are still struggling with this issue. They may have in place 360 degree systems, periodical revisions and all sorts of institutional ways to tell people how there performance is going. Still, it does not happen nearly as well and nearly as frequently as it should. So, is there a time when feedback should not be given? The simple answer is no.

Ideally, you should not even need to set aside special sessions for feedback, though these can be useful and a great way of making a reflective pause in regular operations. It should be an everyday thing. Leaders at every level of the organization should be great at feedback and practice it day in and day out. Changes the organization or powers that be would like to see in their collaborators’ performance, service, attitude or overall work behavior should never come as a surprise to the people involved! They need to be addressed in a timely and effective matter. They beg to be made evident while they are still workable.  Any employee that is being laid off or skipped for a promotion should already have a pretty clear notion of what she would have to change to be in a different position. Any employee that is doing a good job should know that the organization is aware of that.

Though the pace or volume of work is usually blamed for these omissions, it is not actually the case. Fear is.  Fear of reactions. Fear of being silly and giving excessive feedback. Fear of not having information enough to back your perceptions. I could go on and on. You get the point. As a leader, it is your responsibility to overcome your fears and build a day-to-day feedback practice that works both ways with each of your employees and amongst your teams.  A respectful, continuous feedback that makes performance appraisals sessions for review of what you have already explored together, and great opportunities for planning and strategizing change.

Another issue leaders need to be aware of is guilt. Much feedback is skipped because they know they haven’t kept their side of the bargain and are afraid what blaming the feedback would bring out. If, for instance, a boss is asking this employee to learn his trade but the company never authorizes any training, such a boss may skip the feedback regarding the issue to avoid the backlash. But if this situation will jeopardize both the employee’s compensation or permanence in the job and the company’s productivity, silence is a bad choice. Admittance of shortcomings  and open discussion about what is might reveal a poor job fit or creative opportunities within current possible action. Maybe the employee can be mentored, maybe he needs to leave, maybe we can work together, change his workload, pair him up with seasoned personnel.  The possibilities are endless when you address things instead of sweeping them under the rug.

Still a third reason for not giving feedback is that you have lost hope that the person can change. Perhaps she would not be in that position if it were up to you. Perhaps there are organizational reasons to keep her on board until her position can be filled by someone else. There are many excuses that might seem valid, but believing in your employees and treating them as valuable people is a better choice always. Your silence can be toxic not only to that person, but to the rest of your team. More on that in the next post.

Until then, ask yourself: When do I not give feedback? and What am I waiting for?

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• What your team members want from you (threestarleadership.com)
• How to Ask For and Receive Feedback (aspire-cs.com)
• The Gift of Feedback, Part III (onlyonce.blogs.com)